In the midst of this journey which is giving an opportunity for our vulnerabilities to surface, I see one of my greatest flaws; it is that I assume.
I assume one knows this, or one is coming from here or one presently understands such and such. We all know what ‘assume’ means, and it gets me into uncomfortable spots. I do not like beginning at the beginning – I prefer to take off from where I am at – but I all too often forget, others may not be on the same page and yes, I am not on their page either. This can cause either painful communication breakdowns as well as heightened awareness and love brought about through joining together in the humor of the separation itself.
I have witnessed my assuming experience in high volume this past week. I have been at fault (or at love, depending on your perception!) for assuming souls were at a similar spiritual space as I, assuming others all ready were living from The Law of Creative Presence, the Law which expresses to us the great mirror of reflection – empowering us to take 100 % responsibility for our lives. Since I have found myself in this space of awkwardness and assumption, it feels like a perfect time to share the meaning, practice and awareness of 100 % responsibility and what this means – for that Is the core of the teachings, guidance & foundation of The Amethyst Light Ministry.
100 % responsibility is birthed of unconditional love for ones self and humankind.
Like many ministers, I have given several Sunday sermons on ‘forgiveness’. The verbiage and message are based from my personal life experience of being brought up in an alcoholic home with many empty spaces, addictions, fears and obsessions. The sermon message is; I am not responsible for what another does; but I am fully responsible for how I respond, act and be in any situation. I also had learned that one can never run away from what is ours to grow from. (One may say lesson here, but I do not like that. Lesson sounds as if one is a child and has to pass such and such…) We each come here with the same purpose; to learn to love. In this purpose, we each choose life plots in order to open our hearts to unconditional love. Some learn thru abuse, others thru personal addiction, illness, others thru relationships, perhaps love, success, wealth, poverty, etc.
In order for a soul to grow through and into love, God asks of us to believe/do two things:
1. Own our choice to be in this expereince.
Many hear this and react with, ‘you blame me for this? You think I chose this? This is them doing it, not me’.
I believe we choose life themes/paths prior to coming here into this incarnation. I believe that we are constantly choosing and creating through our beliefs and that we can make a shift from creating unconsciously to creating consciously through our individual use of The Law (of God, Attraction, Creativity.)
The Law is the great mirror. We draw to us - as we witness our exterior we need only look within to see how and why it is present.
How did I draw this experience into my reality?
A button is pushed – anger rises; uncomfortable-ness is the feeling, hurt, fear, and angst – a button is pushed. The understanding of The Law teaches us we have a wound which has been re-opened, scraped, touched, bruised once again, in other wards, shown to us – when a button is pushed. This is OUR wound, not theirs – they are the messenger only – we say thank you for exposing this to me again, showing me this is still part of my vibrational field and now I CAN DO my work around this which is crying out to be whole.
As I do my work, as I open to a clearer alignment with God, with unconditional love -- bridges to wholeness are created, my vibration is raised, freedom is Spirits gift to an a awareness of love.
When finding one’s self in a situation of discomfort, in order to move through it and beyond it, we need only take responsibility for having chosen it. I chose it before I came here or I chose it unconsciously by my beliefs, or I chose it because my old wound is not yet healed and it is pretty loud and showing itself to me once again – I chose it.
As I seek within myself and see my beliefs, my stories - I choose to change them through forgiveness, acceptance and compassion.
In having faith in The Law, ‘so above, as below/as within, without’ - we are then empowered through owning our conscious or unconscious choice to be in a particular experience.
When one does not take responsibility for an experience they fall victim to another person or experience and then their ability to act, choose or heal is not available to them.
This action of 100% responsibility does not make a horrible experience good, or a terrible experience better, or an uncomfortable experience less uncomfortable. IT DOES however allow us the room to appreciate seeing it with more clarity and asking; what is mine to do here? Owning our choice here allows us to not be angry at the other, but to say thank you for playing this role in my life that I can know my strength, my power, my faith, my ability to forgive, to love and/or to feel.
2. To own our responsibility before we leave the situation.
Here is the key – to own it before we leave, walk, slam a door, bolt, say good bye, run away or quit. If not, we leave a situation before we can forgive, be grateful for it, appreciate where it brought us and we miss an ( not THE only) opportunity to heal the wound.
Yes, one can leave and do the work afterwards; but the fact is, The Law will continually bring you into similar situations in order for you to be fully present in the midst of them and to ride the wave through them; into love.
“I once told a friend, I was going to get through my relationship with my mother into love this lifetime, because I was **&^&^ sure I was NOT going to have to do another life with this expereince again!” (I am happy to say we did.)
As others have pointed out, does this mean you want me to stay in an abusive situation just to get the lesson?
No, I want you to understand The Law, make it work FOR you, so you can stand fully present and see what is yours to see, shift what is yours to shift within you, in order to move forward more empowered, more loving and less a victim to your own wounds.
Because I grew into a young mindless adult coming from the home I came from, I married yet another version of my parents. My wound called us forward. It was perfect! It had to get worse, before I grew spiritually enough for it to get better; but it got better than ever! I reached a space in my heart where I am so grateful to the souls who were my parents, for all their addictions, dysfunctions and conditional loving – without them I would not be who I am; and for that I know I am eternally grateful. Forgiveness to myself for choosing such a path! – forgiveness to the souls who were my parents, my first husband; for having had to have them be the people they were, so I could become I who I wanted to be -- gratitude all over the place! Forgiveness and joy!
Can you see how the most challenging of your situations is simply the same exact opportunity over and over again? If you can see this, try this:
1. Vision your soul, a presence of energy.
2. Imagine a spiral going around it, beginning at the (your feet) bottom, heading upwards, a perfect spiral, getting smaller, tighter as it elevates to a peak above your head.
3. The beginning is your birth in this carnation.
4. The peak is your God Realization Union.
5. In the bottom part of the spiral see a situation, experiences and the way you handled them. Watch as the spiral moves upward…..all the time you growing spiritually, becoming more enlightened…..and similar situations happening…..and you moving through them with a bit more ease and grace each time…….
6. Until above the center of the spiral you handle an issue of ego, of love, of illness, of abuse, of victimhood, of addiction; with 100 % responsibility.
7. You will no longer need to have that type, that theme of an experience.
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I want this sharing to support you know than you know. Every one of you, who has ever been upset with me for saying 100 % responsibility, thank you. Because of you, I am sharing this. My prayer and intention is I know someone is going to benefit from this writing. In my years of spiritual practice, as a seeker, minister, counselor, healer and teacher; I have witnessed hundreds of souls raise themselves from personal pain and restriction through understanding The Law and creating through taking 100 % responsibility for their role in the play of their life.
With big love, Deborah
I cannot change you – I can only change me.
I am not responsible for you – I am 100% responsible for me.
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