In the Wilderness

Hello Everyone – Namaste;

The energetic intensity of the past few weeks has and is causing some to feel ‘squeezed’. And in this squeezing one is seeing their own stuff, not someone else’s, but one’s own wounds, patterns and disconnections. In a more traditional wording; one is in the wilderness.

In the wilderness we are in the unknown, in new territory. We do not know which way to go, how to get somewhere else, how to find our way, what to say, what to ask, which way to turn. In the wilderness we are new, we are babes. We feel alone. It is a mighty scary place indeed – and even more frightening if we keep expecting the security of a handwritten outcome and the guarantees that go along with all that means to show up BEFORE we take that first baby step. That way of thinking only keeps us in the desert and creates the gerbil wheel of insanity to form in our minds – leaving our hearts running on empty.

Now if one would like to dig deep into the Season, we could also say one is a virgin – in new territory – never before done this or that, feeling insecure, not knowing how, doing the unexpected and being afraid because it is all NEW. And the bold truth is that every day we wake up, we are virgins. We have no idea how the day will become and where we will go.  When we are in new territory, feeling like a babe, that too is a virgin state. Every moment we find ourselves in prayer, we in a virgin state – we are in something we cannot do, fix or figure out by ourselves, so we are calling in God and all other good in order to help us or another find their way through this new territory they are experiencing.

In my ‘a different church every Sunday tour’ I am on, yesterday I went to the Congregational Church of Topsfield. Here is a prayer from them:

“Gracious and merciful God, we confess to you our reluctance to enter the wilderness places where we are confronted with our true selves. The places where we are tempted to put worldly values before our desire for you. When we are tempted to use the gifts you give us to benefit ourselves at the expense of serving others: Forgive us God and increase our trust in you. Merciful God, forgive us our sins and fill us with your Spirit that we put our whole trust in you as confidently as Jesus did. Amen. “

For many of The ALM/CoSE family this may sound a bit old school and patriarchal; but read it anyway and speak it out loud. It carries good, real, true, insights. God is gracious and based on how humans treat themselves and one another – more merciful than anybody I know can imagine. And we DO put worldly values before our desire of God. It is what gets us feeling empty, sad and afraid. That’s a no brainer, my beloveds. Whenever you even think about or if you are living a life where you place worldy deisres BEFORE your desire to know God as your self; well, it is not a comfortable place to be. And if you DO know Gods goodness and generosity and then try to USE that in a righteous state of saying you are serving another human – well my friends; ego will have the upper hand.

Jesus exemplified perfect trust in God. We cannot possibly know it all – we may not even know a little teeny tiny bit of IT – but we do know how it feels inside our own bellies when we stray from seeking the highest form of Love and compassion and kindness in any given action to ourselves or another human being. And this is why I teach you the discernment process in order for you to KNOW thyself so you can use your inner compass in depending on this nonphysical entity called Holy Spirit in order to find your way out of your wilderness; or as you have heard me say, your head is in a paper bag and you can’t find your way out.

If you are seeing your own self clearly, seeing your error, your lack way of thinking, seeing things you simply do not like about yourself; first off, be gentle on yourself.  Then accept yourself for where you are. It is an experience. If you see you have been selfish; know, okay, I have been selfish. I chose this experience in order to know God more. You are human, you are here in form to become more loving; to know God. That is not an easy trip and one of less courage does not choose to make it.

Secondly, take a breath. Okay now, affirm your faith in God. Pray. Sit. Read, repeat, mantra, OM, sing, dance, do an act which brings you into your awareness of your all ready made connection of God. And ask to have the same faith in God that Jesus exemplified.

  “Mother, Father God I am here. I ask to know You deeply – I ask to feel  You without doubt. I ask to know the same faith, trust and dependency on You which my brother, friend and way shower Jesus did. I ask to feel You in my belly, deep in my heart, in every cell of my body – in order to choose a more loving action for and to myself and others. Thank you God.”

Okay, thirdly; today, do it differently. Take a small baby step through the unknown wilderness and do something differently than you have been doing it. Anything. 

Tomorrow, wake up and start again.

When we are in the wilderness, virgins on a new unexpected experience of spiritual sight; we have to accept who we are and where we have been. And we can only do that through knowing that we are each human, each frail  along the journey, each forgiving of ourselves and others, each surrendering to God in order to heal our hearts; KNOWNG this is NOT something we do alone. No one does it alone. Every single person is the same and wants the same thing and came here to experience an individual journey in order to find it. E-v-e-r-y one. No matter what they do for work, who they are, what language they speak, how rich or poor, how educated or not. Every single person is a child of the Most High God and every single person is struggling in some way -- to find their way -- out of their own paper bag. Be gentle on yourself and others, and sooner than latter you will find your way out of the wilderness. 

with great love, Rev Deb